Random Expressions

Don’t get trapped in self-pity: It’s a trap that is very difficult to avoid. Staying alone means facing your thoughts in solitary confinements. And in this it is easy to get into a self-piteous mode. Socialize as much as your mental disposition allows. And if you are an introvert, try not to be in front of the internet for too long. The one-way silent communication adds to the dullness and depression. A television is a better option, since visuals-with-sound destroys the silence and the monotony.

Don’t drink alone: Pretty much linked to above. Once that sadness creeps in, liquor seems the best mate to share it with. After a while, you start enjoying the drinks with some superbly sad songs - looking forward to it daily and eventually get addicted. Simply keep a strong check on your will-power; and if you must drink alone, let it not be at your place. The best idea is not to keep either liquor bottles or its accessories (soda, cold drinks) at your place at all. I have been through the routine of drinking alone, playing some sad songs and generally feeling sorry honestly, it didn’t help to alleviate the pain. Rather, it aggravated. And then, to assuage the enhanced pain, the next evening would be more depressive the vicious circle simply goes on! You are not a Hindi film hero, and the crescendo of the background song doesn’t end the scene - the hangover remains suspended heavily in your brain and body! Also, if you are a smoker, the intake can substantially increase, so keep an eye on the consumption!

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Bring out the enforcements. Call the protectors. Burn effigies. Damage properties. Take out to the street. How dare the public go about earning their roti, kapda aur Mercedez¹ when our thousand year old yet vulnerable like a kid culture is again under attack? Foreign hand or rather foreign mouth has again swooped over our petite modesty to kiss and ravage, and lo and behold, that too publicly. It’s a different matter that Shilpa Shetty hardly looks like a wronged woman, and certainly not when a several-million-pound win is not at stake.


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One thing that I enormously detest is sychophancy. I simply have no patience or love lost for those self seeking servile flatterers who cozy up to their bosses and make life miserable for others who cannot do so. I convincingly belong to the group that can only look at anger and amusement at such fawning parasites who would probably even go to the extent of writing odes on the mole on the superior’s face.

A sub-class of people in the sycophant category is the one who would show their bosses every small work they do, even if it is just a routine matter, highlighting it, asking permissions and suggestions, and making it sound something special. These are such people that they would even seek permission from the boss to go to the loo and probably dash off a mail to him asking for the technique to do so! Request your advice , suggestion , help or approval are phrases and words generously peppered in such mails, which in all probabilities would be unnecessarily cc’ed to everyone in the department!

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I am sure any self-respecting medical journal will give you pretty simple, doable and practical answers eat a light dinner, take a small walk, wear loose clothes, count till whatever number you can count till and many more.

But one very important advice they forget is something which I realized recently, and it actually confused me initially: keep your conscience clean and satisfied; because if you do not do so you are bound to pound the poor bed, turning and twisting the night long.

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In my current job assignment I meet a lot of the government servant types (I cringe at the use of the word ’servant’ , clearly an odious legacy from the British era). I have noticed that they are the ones who almost always have a very neat and cut out life.

Often they ask me about my family. And the surprise (or rather, the shock) on their face is more than visible when I state I am single. It is impossible for them to comprehend that I chose to stay this way, willingly and happily, after my divorce. Invariably, they will go on to list out the virtues of getting married and the need to be settled an argument which rankles me no end. Why can’t I be ’settled’ without the burden of marriage?

But a more pertinent question is, why even be settled in life?

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In his weekly column in a leading national daily, eminent writer and UN diplomat Shashi Tharoor has emotionally implored the nation’s women to save the sari from possible extinction. I echo his sentiments.

Since childhood I have a strong fascination for the sari - not that I indulge in some secret and perverse pleasure in (cross) dressing in them, but it is the sari’s visual appeal which fuels the fascination. Possibly, this attraction stems from watching Sridevi cavorting in bright red and blue chiffon saris in Jaanbaaz and Mr. India respectively, during my growing up years. And then all those Yash Chopra romantic films further cemented their allure. Today, the sari has reinvented itself into a style statement, but still I find a Sushmita Sen much more enticing in Mai Hoon Na than her corporate suits in various other films. And the sari lent a unique appeal to Aishwarya Rai’s tall and skinny frame in the second half of Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam. In the earlier generation, Rakhee was a huge favorite, and despite having a body that most heroines today would scoff at, she was an epitome of polish and poise and possibly with the widest collection of saris.

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Trust the administration to do some good act in totally half-baked pathetic manner. Recently, at Janpath, Delhi Police has started issuing warnings over a loud speaker - they include, amongst others: not to touch unclaimed objects, not to speak to strangers or accept gifts/foodstuff from them, not to hire domestic/shop helps without proper verification etc. All fine. All sane stuff. But, they repeat it ad naseum… in Hindi! Now, anyone knows that Janpath is forever infested with foreigners from all across the globe; the least they could do is to repeat the same in English! Plus, I fail to understand why they have chosen only Janpath - which is just a sliver of Connaught Place (the central Delhi swanky market cum office place)? Or, have I missed listening to it on the other blocks? It wasnt there at Palika Bazar today for sure!

Frankly, it must be pretty irritating for those who work there. To hear the same thing over and over again can be highly grating on the nerves. Plus, those ‘bhonpu‘ shaped speakers aren’t exactly Bose in their sound output - so the screechy voice followed by a shrill chime is as musical as a cat clawing over a blackboard! I stood there having my lunch for approx. ten minutes, and couldn’t take it any further.

Noise pollution continued to hound me today.

I don’t think it was very far in the past when we all survived without mobile phones. So the overdependence on this device pretty much leaves me stone-faced. Agreed it has an absolutely wonderful usage during emergencies. But seriously, to giggle into the mobile phone in the temple is stretching the definition of ‘emergencies’ a bit too far! Every Tuesday, at our neighborhood temple, without fail I witness several pretty young things (yeah, it’s the girls more always!) dodging into a corner, with their hands cupped and faces buried away into sleek handsets. The worst sight could be to see someone chatting on the phone while pouring ‘jal‘ over Shivling!

Actually, I wouldn’t really mind that. Since they do not per se disturb others - that is, if they keep their voice volumes low! It’s the ring tones that I have major problem with. The concept of ring tones and hello tones is awful… esp the latter. I mean, what fun do people get in inflicting torture on the poor hapless soul who has called them by showering an utterly raucous voice called Shamur - cant decide whether this thing is male or female- rasping away inane lyrics like ‘Mera Ranjha Badi Der’ (that’s all that I could comprehend in this hideous song)?

Anyways, that is when you call someone.

But what to say of a situation when you are sitting to read your Shiv Chalisa in the temple…and out wails Himesh Reshamiiya from a friendly neighborhood mobile phone?

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On the basis of its win in Bengal, the Left claims it will be ’stronger’ and have more say in the matters of Central interest. Everyone seems to have taken this with muted acknowledgement, as if it is a but-natural thing to happen.

I fail to understand the logic. How does a win in one (or two) states change equation at the Centre? How can a regional win mean that the party has achieved right to be a bully for the entire nation?

Can any one explain? I am completely lost!

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Sitting in the plush environs of the restaurant at Radisson, Kathmandu, with the head of our company’s advertisement agency, I casually enquired, Why do Nepalis hate Indians? At first he evaded the question with an incoherent mumble. I laughed. He couldn t fool me, I informed him. It was evident and there was enough documentary proof available for this. On a small persistence, he opened up, and what he told me was something that I was aware of, but that day it hit a bit harder. What he said can be paraphrased as such: Nepalese are not born hating Indians, certainly not the way we do our other neighbor, but there is a significant number of Nepali students who go to India for studies. There, they are subjected to ridicule, called unfriendly names like Bahadur and chowkidar and they return with a strong and seething resentment. (This is a simplistic view, without taking into account the political policies, but still it is a strong ground).


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In Hum Tum, in an exasperated outpour, Rhea Prakash (Rani Mukherjee) laments that why should everyone get down to matchmaking as soon as they sight a single girl; why should marriage be the end-goal for a girl? It is astonishing (and sad) that how Indian girls see marriage and having kids the be-all and end-all of life; be it Madhuri Dixit, or your ordinary colleague, it seems the grand Indian middle class dissolves this dictum in the milk they feed that your life’s sole goal is to get married. Though this trait is there for the men too (you are not considered “settled” till the time you have a spouse, despite having the best of jobs and the biggest of cars), the girls take to this norm like fish to water.


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